Thoughts on Eye Contact - A post on MASF
http://www.fastseduction.com/masf/8/331531/
topic: Thoughts on Eye Contact (EC) (1 of 3)
board: General
from: DocJohnson / profile / recent posts by DocJohnson
(first login: January, 30, 2005 11:59 PM)
date: Friday, June 23, 2006 12:41 AM
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I just posted this at my lair as a reply to an earlier post. I would like some feedback and constructive criticism on this from those who are better at PU than I am:
"A few of my personal insights on eye contact (EC), which I believe is probably the most under-rated skills in PU:
- Many years ago I learned somewhere (on TV or at some communication seminar or something), that most people feel uncomfortable giving much EC. A great trick that makes it easy to give EC, esp. when you're starting out, is to look directly at the spot between the eyes at the top of the bridge of the nose. It avoids the discomfort of looking straight in the eye, it tricks the other person into thinking that you are maintaining good EC, and it comes across as a very confident, strong, non-creepy form of EC. Try it, even with your wingman and see what I mean.
- The way your EC comes across to the one receiving has a lot to do with your frame of mind. When you give someone else good EC, you actually project your attitude into them. If you are nervous or scared, they will feel nervous and creeped out. The attitudes I try to maintain are either relaxed contentment, a "you are already mine" confidence, or a seething passionate lust that is barely restrained. In fact, I can honestly say that good EC is, far and away, my most common opener. If I make good EC with a HB, she will either approach me, or position herself near me, so that I'll open her. If she does the latter, I'll then bust on her for being so lame in her attempt to play hard to get. By then, it's over.
- This kind of EC is also a great way to escalate. A very passionate intense sensuality can be communicated during conversational dead space that women find extremely attractive. Eventually, she will become so aroused or uncomfortable or wet by it, that she'll inevitably say "What?". When she does, don't say a word. Just give her a smile and a squint that says "You know what".
- Women consciously or unconsciously use EC to demonstrate interest. I have had hundreds of instances when there was a woman right there in proximity who I knew was purposely avoiding EC with me, for fear of making me think she was interested. Those ones are harder for me to approach, because I feel I am already at a disadvantage. They are still often approachable.
- One of the scenes I have seen recently showing the power of good EC in PU was in the movie "Alfie". Jude Law is at a bar, and these two women next to him at the bar are commenting on the "Eurotrash" in the area, referring to him. He acts completely oblivious, gives both excellent EC and a very genuine pleasant smile, and wins them in an instant - he passed their bitch test.
- This hasn't happened often enough, but when it has, it has been flawless: If a HB maintains strong EC with me for an extended period, basically the PU is over, without exchanging any words. That has only happened one or two dozen times in my life, but when it has, it has really worked well.
- Good EC can be learned, is very easy to practice, usually produces measurable results fairly quickly, and works well for lots of things besides PU.
If you try any of this stuff out, let me know how it goes."
topic: Thoughts on Eye Contact (EC) (1 of 3)
board: General
from: DocJohnson / profile / recent posts by DocJohnson
(first login: January, 30, 2005 11:59 PM)
date: Friday, June 23, 2006 12:41 AM
vote: (popup) √ rate this user
√ rate this post (popup)
I just posted this at my lair as a reply to an earlier post. I would like some feedback and constructive criticism on this from those who are better at PU than I am:
"A few of my personal insights on eye contact (EC), which I believe is probably the most under-rated skills in PU:
- Many years ago I learned somewhere (on TV or at some communication seminar or something), that most people feel uncomfortable giving much EC. A great trick that makes it easy to give EC, esp. when you're starting out, is to look directly at the spot between the eyes at the top of the bridge of the nose. It avoids the discomfort of looking straight in the eye, it tricks the other person into thinking that you are maintaining good EC, and it comes across as a very confident, strong, non-creepy form of EC. Try it, even with your wingman and see what I mean.
- The way your EC comes across to the one receiving has a lot to do with your frame of mind. When you give someone else good EC, you actually project your attitude into them. If you are nervous or scared, they will feel nervous and creeped out. The attitudes I try to maintain are either relaxed contentment, a "you are already mine" confidence, or a seething passionate lust that is barely restrained. In fact, I can honestly say that good EC is, far and away, my most common opener. If I make good EC with a HB, she will either approach me, or position herself near me, so that I'll open her. If she does the latter, I'll then bust on her for being so lame in her attempt to play hard to get. By then, it's over.
- This kind of EC is also a great way to escalate. A very passionate intense sensuality can be communicated during conversational dead space that women find extremely attractive. Eventually, she will become so aroused or uncomfortable or wet by it, that she'll inevitably say "What?". When she does, don't say a word. Just give her a smile and a squint that says "You know what".
- Women consciously or unconsciously use EC to demonstrate interest. I have had hundreds of instances when there was a woman right there in proximity who I knew was purposely avoiding EC with me, for fear of making me think she was interested. Those ones are harder for me to approach, because I feel I am already at a disadvantage. They are still often approachable.
- One of the scenes I have seen recently showing the power of good EC in PU was in the movie "Alfie". Jude Law is at a bar, and these two women next to him at the bar are commenting on the "Eurotrash" in the area, referring to him. He acts completely oblivious, gives both excellent EC and a very genuine pleasant smile, and wins them in an instant - he passed their bitch test.
- This hasn't happened often enough, but when it has, it has been flawless: If a HB maintains strong EC with me for an extended period, basically the PU is over, without exchanging any words. That has only happened one or two dozen times in my life, but when it has, it has really worked well.
- Good EC can be learned, is very easy to practice, usually produces measurable results fairly quickly, and works well for lots of things besides PU.
If you try any of this stuff out, let me know how it goes."
posted by xmlenigma at 1:55 PM
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